Dream Days at the Hospital Existence

So in the midst of all the saga in Canberra - I jotted down a few points. These are totally unrelated to public relations or social media, but I figure they're worth sharing. So introducing:

How to tell if you've spent too much time in a hospital

- When the waiting rooms turns into a lounge room and you are up to date on all the latest hollywood gossip courtesy of all the crappy magazines.

- With no medical background, you know what intubate means, what an NG tube does, how blood oxygen sat machines can be temperamental and that nurses really do all the hard work.

- You also realise that hospital coffee tastes the same as any other fluid after a few sugars, and that cafeteria food usually isn't as bad as what the patients are getting served up.

- You know that breaking a nail, finger or leg is not comparable to what families have to go through when visiting family in the ICU.

- You're on a first name's basis with the night time security guard.

- That no matter that you look older or similar to your sibling, you will continually get confused as a girlfriend or wife.

- You appreciate the irony when the random strangers ask you why you're there (at the hospital) to which you reply 'car accident' and they reply "glad it wasn't the one where..." and you suddenly realise it is the one they're retelling.

- When the alcohol antiseptic spray you put on each time you enter the ward becomes your latest cologne/perfume.

- When you're allowed to eat at the staff cafertia and use a mobile phones on the ward.

P.S. In case you didn't get it, the title is a pun on one of my favourite Powderfinger albums :)